Lots of couples tend to lose their sexuality after they have kids. Some women are just too sore down there to be interested. Some men get scared that their wives sweet honey hole will just not be what it used to be. Some are just too exhausted to even think about sex. And before they all know it,their baby has started school and they wonder just how to go back to the time they couldnt keep their hands off each other.
My opinion? Its a setup. Couples unwittingly set themselves up and later realise that picking up the pieces is somewhat difficult. If you are already in this situation I'll try to give some tips that will hopefully get you back on track.
Share the same room.-
Yep. Sounds simple right? Afterall its only natural that the mum or mum in law comes around and the husband will 'excuse' himself from your room. NO! This shouldnt be the case. Before you know it this becomes the 'norm'. Your partner will continue to sleep in another room because the baby will 'disturb' his sleep as he grows a little older. Hmnn. You need to find a way around this. Against all odds,you should make sure you both sleep on the same bed. Your sex life depends on this! Make alternative sleeping arrangements for her,even if you have to move between rooms after you feed your child.
Baby shouldn't sleep in the middle:
If you co-sleep with your child,re-arrange your room such that your baby doesnt have to sleep between you and your husband. Soft flannels or a soft pillow can be used to guard the child from falling off the bed. Its even safer that way. The best place for a child to sleep is in a crib in your room..but I wont judge because I co-sleep sometimes too. So, re-arrange and spoon away with your lover. Theres nothing as sexy as feeling his hard-on as you wiggle your behind against him. 😆.
Plan to have sex:
Having sex after a baby is like having sex for the first time. So..it should be special. Once the doctor has given you the thumbs up to do the deed...you need to set the mood. Chances are you're both so exhausted from taking care of the baby anyway. So..you need to first talk about it. Make him realise it wont be bad and you're ready. Make her realise you're going to be gentle and take it slow. And this leads to the next point.
Take it slow-
Her body has changed. Her breasts are fuller and filled with milk. Her hormornes are still all over the place,her vagina or her belly is still a bit sore from pushing your baby out or her csection...but she misses lovemaking as much as you do. So..take it slow. This is not the time for wham bang. Foreplay is key. Get her soft and pliant. If you need lubrication..dont be shy to go for it. Take it real slow. Touch her. Love her. You know what i mean na. Wink.
Get your sexy back-
Having a baby doesnt give you the right to tie wrapper from morning till night. You need to break out those short dresses (breastfeeding friendly) and bum shorts. Have sex in your mind first before doing the deed. Give him an eyefull and let your body tell him you're ready. Everyman wants his wife to be a hot mama. True your body has changed. Your strechmarks are your battle scars. You brought life into the world. You should wear them confidently and with pride. Love your body. .and your husband will love it too.
I hope I've been able to touch the important points. Please feel free to drop your comments..and dont forget to subscribe by email and follow so you dont miss any of the exciting topics I have in store for you. Did someone say sex tips? I've got you covered! Just watch out.
Ttyl,
Love,
Tmon.
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